Thursday, December 4, 2014

Don't Judge Me: My Son Sleeps In His Crib

This morning, I read an article called, "Why Co-Sleeping Works For Us, Even If It Scares You" By Brooke Dowd Sacco. While I am absolutely fine with her decision to co-sleep, what I am NOT OK with is comments like this, "I didn’t expect to be able to take off my mom hat between the hours of 7pm and 7am. I’m running a 24 hour operation here." Her statement implies that because my son sleeps in his own room, that I'm somehow not his mother at night? Because he sleeps soundly for several hours at a time, in his own room, that I'm 'off duty'?! 

Here's another comment that irked me, "To me, my daughter is more important than a perfect night’s sleep." Oh, right. That's why I put him in his crib, because he isn't important. Actually, he is important. But he isn't the center of the universe. I happen to have two other boys, two dogs, a home to keep, a full time job, and a HUSBAND! I can't go to bed at 7 pm with the baby, and ignore all of my other responsibilities! Ms. Sacco has a husband, who obviously supports her co-sleeping with their daughter. "In the beginning, when my husband and I discussed where our daughter would sleep, he was happy to hear she wouldn’t be alone in her room downstairs." My son's room was an addition, created by splitting our bedroom in half. So he is extremely close to me. Not that his room being downstairs would be ideal, but it would not lead to co-sleeping.

She continues, "No matter how many times she (her daughter) needs me during the wee hours, he (her husband) wakes up well rested, and for us, this is a good thing. He has to get up and go to work 5 days a week. Happy husband, happy life?" Well, Brooke, I have to get up at the wee hours and go to work. But even if I did stay home, I would not be able to handle not getting any restful sleep. I wouldn't be able to fall asleep with him in my bed- since my husband moves CONSTANTLY in his sleep. I would be worried about the baby! 

Everyone's situation is unique. Some mothers work, some stay home. Some do both, and are home with the children during the day and work at night! Some babies sleep in their parents' bed, some sleep in cribs, and some are in the room in a bassinet. No 'one way' is perfect, and all of us are doing the best we can. This article made me feel like 'my way is right, and your way is wrong' which helps NO ONE. 

Now, please be quiet, my baby is sleeping.